January 17, 2021

The Ingress Prime Address

The release notes for Ingress 2.31.2 are out, and I don’t want to say the list of new features and bug fixes is long, but there are as many words (272) in Brian Rose’s post about it as there are in Lincoln’s famous Gettysburg Address.

While this update doesn’t quite solve 100% of the outstanding issues your Not Ingress GCM has using Prime, it is so much closer. So to commemorate this important release, here is Not Niantic Labs’ Ingress Prime Address:

Fifteen score and eight days ago, our shapers brought forth on this planet, a new scanner, conceived in Unity, and dedicated to the proposition that all agents are created equal. Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that XM universe, or any XM universe so redacted and so recursed, can long endure. We are met on a great control-field of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of that field, as a final resting place for those who gave their accounts that that prime scanner might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this. But, in a larger sense, we can not uninstall – we can not upgrade – we can not retire – this redacted scanner. The brave agents, active and retired, who struggled here, have upgraded it, far above our poor power to adapt or complain. The world will little note, nor long remember scanner redacted, but it can never forget what agents did here. It is for us the Prime agents, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who used only earlier versions of the scanner have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us – that from these honored retirees we take increased devotion to the cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion – that we here highly resolve that these retired shall not have retired in vain – that this universe, under XM, shall have a new birth of freedom – and that a scanner of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.

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